We are having a cowboy christmas this year. We live in Austin Texas, and our chances of having a white christmas are the same as a snowball's chance in .... oh, you get the idea. To add insult to injury, it's probably going to be fairly warm (60s or maybe even 70s) on christmas day. Add to that that Hubby doesn't like turkey all that much, even though he makes the best smoked one around, and also dislikes ham, and you run out of options when you're the hosting the meal on the big day.
So, Hubby is going to smoke a brisket. My mom is making her famous picnic potato salad and a pecan pie, which I'll serve with bluebell vanilla bean ice cream. I'll make homemade charo beans. We'll serve as much "texas" themed food as I can think of, even for appetisers... sugared pecans, chips and salsa, and grilled jalepeno poppers... which are pickled jalepenos, filled with cream cheese, wrapped in bacon, and grilled. So good! We're even having my brother and his family come over, so I'm really looking forward to having a good time with my family this year.

Where has the time gone? Thanksgiving seems like a distant memory. Boy's 13th Birthday was on December 2, so the family made the annual pilgrimage to Dave and Busters... my favorite place. No, really... not at all.
Then between work and getting ready for Christmas, what you have is no time to write. I have done some shopping, tonight, in fact... gotta love amazon dot com, always open and inexpensive to boot... and free shipping! I picked up some movies for Hubby and boy, and books for both boy and precious baby.
The lights are up and the tree is lit, and actually... it looks pretty good. This is the first year we've put lights up since we moved in to this house. The first Christmas after we moved in, Precious Baby was a newborn, so you know there was no way we were ever going to get around to hanging lights that year. Last year, she was still only just a year old, and honestly, I couldn't find the time to nag Hubby and boy to do it. But this year, Hubby and Boy actually volunteered to do it, or as Hubby put it, "do it voluntarily before you wear it out asking me." At any rate, I'm really glad he and Boy hung the lights. It looks so festive, and Precious baby just thinks the whole thing is so magical. Now I know why parents love the holidays; it's that look of wonder in the eyes of your little ones that could melt the coldest heart.
What I'm really looking forward to, though, is the Trail of Lights, an annual Christmas light display in the park here in town. Every year it gets better and better... it's a true spectacle. At the end of the walk (approximately a mile) you come to huge, I mean really huge (5 stories, maybe) Christmas tree. The tree itself isn't actually a tree, it's a bunch of huge light strings suspended from a moontower. Since it's actually open, you can run right under the tree and twirl around until you fall down, dizzy from both the spinning and the magic of the holiday.
But, as far as I'm concerned, the best part about the Trail of Lights is the story that Boy can tell precious baby. A few years ago, (OK, more than few) Boy won a coloring contest. As first prize, he got to actually light the giant Christmas tree... meaning that he got to stand on stage in the park on the first night of the Trail of Lights and he flipped the big switch for the tree with the mayor. Not too many kids can say they lit the Zilker Tree... and I'm looking forward to hearing boy tell precious baby this story as they twirl around under that big tree, falling down on the ground, dizzy from the magic spell that the holidays cast on all of us.

So I am continuing to train for the half marathon... it's the ATT Half Marathon on February 17, 2008. 13. 1 miles of running. I've been running for a while, and I was even up to running ten mile long runs earlier this year, before I was felled by our intense summer heat. I am currently running 5-6 days per week, but to start serious training next week, I'll have to back off of that a bit. I'll be running four days a week, and I'll start with 4-5-4-7... that's four miles, day off, five miles, day off, 4 miles, day off, and then the long run, starting at 7 miles but working my way up to 12 eventually.
I'll be picking up the repaired tires for my jogging stroller this weekend, which will be great... I'll be able to do the weekday runs in the late afternoon with precious baby... as long as it doesn't get too cold. On the days we don't run, I can cycle or do some other type of work out at the Y, especially since, starting next week, precious baby will start attending pre school at the Y... now isn't that convenient! Not to mention less expensive than her current day care. And when it is too cold for precious baby to be in the stroller, well, that's another good time to be at the Y, I can jog on the treadmill.

Remember that show, "Kids say the darndest things?"
Hosted by no other than the Jello man, Cliff Huxtable, aka Bill Cosby?

Precious Baby was getting a little whiney yesterday afternoon. I asked her,

"Do you want a snack?"

"yesssss! I hungwey!" said precious baby, nodding her head vigorously.

"How about some crackers?"

Precious baby's eyes lit up. "Crac-quors! Crack-quors!" She gleefully sang out. I tried really, really hard not to laugh.... it sounded just like crack whores.


Somehow, I just don't think she'd make the cut for prime time with that one.

So another thanksgiving has come and gone. Hubby made a fantastic Smoked turkey again this year. It was even better than the one he made last year. I also made a oven roasted turkey for those who don't like smoked... but we sure had a lot less smoked turkey left overs than we had roasted turkey left overs. I've got the bones and carcasses on the stove right now, making a big pot of stock. Yum.

It was good thanksgiving on the family front too. We had my brother and sister in law here, along with my mother and father in law. Historically, I haven't always seen eye to eye with my MIL, but this year was better than ever... while we may never be the best of buds, we sure are getting along a lot better, and I think we are actually enjoying each other's company, rather than feeling forced into niceness.

Running continues. While I took Thursday and Friday off, I did run six miles on Wednesday, and I intend to run at least five tomorrow. I really do want to run that half marathon in february, but even more importantly, I really, really want to look good when we go to Hawaii in June 08. I've got 7 months.... to go from a 12 to 6. I've got to get there... I just can't imagine the idea of week of sun and fun in Hawaii on cruise ship, in the current shape I'm in. Right now, I can't imagine going out in public in bathing suit. While I don't think I'm going to look perfect as a size 6, well, I'm so far from that now that comparatively, a size 6 would be fantastic! But the only way I'm going to get there is to keep doing what I'm doing... running and watching what I eat. So. time to pick it up again, first thing in the morning. In the meantime.... I am trying to resist the cheesecake, calling my name from the fridge.

Please check out Blibber Blabber, at www.blibberblabber.com the continuing saga of the Rafels/Wentworth-Young/Delaney Family in Cedar Park, Texas. Especially the photos! Adam and Britany are great friends, and are the Mother and Step father of Andrew, my step son, as well as being precious baby's honorary aunt and uncle.

Suburban Turmoil: Bug Bites and Tutus

Go and check this out....Suburban Turmoil: Bug Bites and Tutus and you'll know exactly what I've been worrying about now that precious baby is talking!

still not thinner. Still working out. I think I found what works for me, though. Running. I've been douing it a lot... Since the first of October, and I know I'm getting thinner. The scale isn't really budging much and I question how accurate it is, but I know what I'm doing is working because my clothes are getting looser.

Yesterday was meat sauce day... when I make a huge vat of meat sauce and we freeze it up in portioned bags. Making meat sauce is such an effort that I wouldn't make it unless I was making it in quantity. It takes at least five hours of simmering to get it right, but at least it doesn't require a bunch of pot watching. you know it's done and the consistancy is correct when a mixing spoon will stand up in the sauce. I took a picture of that which I'll have to post.

I seem to finally be recovered from my illness of last week. I ran yesterday for the first time in a week. ran four miles and still felt good. I'll be going to run today too.... got to train for that half marathon in february.

thanksgiving this week. Hubby's family comming for dinner. We are doing two turkeys... one over roasted, and one smoked.... Can't wait to have the smoked one... it's my favorite... and Hubby does it really, really well. Everyone else is bringing sides and wine... I just have to do the over roasted turkey that day, and make the stuffing, and I'll make a cheese cake too. Of course, I do have to clean the house.... my mother in law is OCD about housework and I doubt that she's above the white glove test... Not like my house would pass after I clean it either, I mean, hey, I have a toddler and some things are just more important that house work, but at least after I clean the house will look presentable.

Speaking of precious baby, she is barely recognizable from this time last year! She changed so much in just one year! It's really hard to beleive! this picture is of her and I from the Texas Renasance Festival and was taken last weekend. She is such a big girl!!!http://www.flickr.com/photos/gadgetadam/1974286431/in/set-72157603095754866/

Meh. Weighed myself yesterday. Lost about three pounds. Down to 175. I wanted to weigh less! I've been busting my ass for the last two weeks and a three pound loss was all I got! I was really hoping for about a five pound loss! Oh well. Any loss is a loss and I'll take it. On the upside, my jeans feel better than ever. Hubby washed them yesterday, and we all know how jeans shrink a bit when they are washed, and when I put them on this morning they felt just fine. Hopefully in two weeks they will be loose.

Maybe I'm just getting too hung up on what the scale says. Hubby says I need to be more concerned with how my clothes fit and not concerned with the scale... maybe he's right. It is just a number... but, right now, it's a big number! I guess I wouldn't feel so bad if I were a smaller size... but I guess that's what I'm working out for.

On the positive, I ran at the gym last night on the treadmill for 45 minutes, with relative ease... I say "relative" because it seemed a little tough at first, like for about the first five minutes or so, until I got my rhythem... it's funny, but when I run I can really get into a "groove" where I feel like I could just run for miles (or hours). Last night I ran about 3.5 miles. I'll be running just about the same distance tomorrow, Saturday, pushing Precious baby in the jogging stroller when we do the Lil Longhorn 5K race. I'm not planning to run for time, just for fun and exercise... but I plan to run the whole thing.

Of course, all of the running is a lead up to the Capital 10K, which I want to run this year. In years past, I've run it... I didn't do it last year, and the year before, I was pregnant so I walked it. But I plan to run the whole thing this year... and I'll probably do the Texas Round up too, since by doing so I can get free leave from work, which is always a good thing.

Then of course, tomorrow I need to go shopping for Hubby's valentines gift. I would have done it today at lunch, but my car is in the shop so I'm not going anywhere today. But I've decided what to get him and I know where to go to get it. I won't say what, since, for all I know, he is reading the blog and I don't want to spoil the suprise. But since I will have to go to the mall to get it, that will give me a chance to visit with the bag again at the Coach store. Nothing like a little motivation to keep me going to gym and eating right!

The weight and handbag obsession is growing! Don't tell, but I went to the Coach outlet yesterday and almost walked out with a Zoe clutch.... cutest thing ever! Also checking out a few authentic satchels on a "popular auction site".

It's so hard to resist! I didn't see any really great (read, cheap) prices yesterday, other than the clutch, but I managed to hold out. I did not see my Legacy handbag... but was not surprised that it was not at the outlet. I did, however, allow myself to purchase a $10 key ring... a shiny, glittery star... so cute! And some leather conditioner to keep my bags looking good.

Getting on the scale today for a weigh in... worried. I've been working hard, and I really want to see some progress... I am afraid I'll only see a one pound loss after two weeks. Any loss is good, but I want to be thin now!

I know, I know.. being obsessive. Hubby would just shake his head in wonderment if he could read my inner thoughts... heck, if he read this blog! I've invited him here, but he just smiles and says no thanks... just watch though, he really is reading it... and probably sitting somewhere, shaking his head in wonderment at how his wife could be so OCD.

So the contractor who was supposed to come and give us a bid never showed up on Saturday and didn't even give me courtesy call to say he wasn't going to make it! Some people. Well, I just won't be spending my hard earned dollars with you. It did tick me off though... because we planned our Saturday morning around that appointment... we all went to the gym... I worked out while precious baby went to the playroom, and Boy and Hubby played basketball. I cut my workout short just to make sure we would be home on time, and then he no-showed. I really just don't want to deal with someone who doesn't take my time seriously.

We had such a busy weekend! We had our annual superbowl party on Sunday night and it was fun...of course I had no emotional investment in the game and I barely watched it... I was more interested in the much hyped Kevin Federline commercial than I was in the game. But, I did work out this weekend, both days, and I sure am glad I did so, since we had so much good food at the party! I still felt guilty about eating it... deep dish pizza, hot dogs, sausage... but at least I had worked out, so I felt a little less guilty... so hopefully the one day of pigging out didn't make too much of a negative impact.

One other thing I did this weekend was to get started on organizing my/hubby's closet. I found all kinds of clothing that I had forgotten that I had... a lot of which hopefully fits, now that I'm losing weight. I also filled a huge bag to the top of clothing and shoes to give to charity. It felt really good to purge all that junk from my closet and neaten up... I feel better just walking into the closet now that I can see all of my stuff, hanging up or neatly folded. Now I just need some open shelving for my growing handbag collection... I'd like to have nice open shelves with some lighting... and I'd like to hand a door sized mirror on the inside of the closet door so I can see myself full length.

Speaking of handbags, I'll be weighing myself this Thursday... two weeks since the last time. Hopefully I'll be able to post some good progress. I am wearing a size 10 A-line skirt today, but skirts are much more forgiving than pants, and especially jeans. But my 12s are nice and comfortable... not to tight, not too loose... so I think I'm making some progress. Can't wait to get that handbag... it's taking quite some restraint not to go buy it right now. But, I know it will be all the sweeter since I'll have earned it, and I'll look so much better carrying it, since I'll be thinner.

The renovation quest continues. We've got one bid for cutting the doorway through our living room wall. We have another contractor coming this Saturday morning to give us another bid. I'm going to buy the flashing and arrange for the concrete to be poured next weekend. I am ready to get this show on the road! I want my new (old) porch as soon as possible! By my birthday (in weeks) if possible!

I'm just so ready to get this done. I'm also excited about the fact that it is going to make us throw a lot of things away, or give them to good will. We have bunch of stuff in boxes in this little storage area of the game room. Hubby said to me the other day that we should leave that room there instead of demolishing it along with the rest of the game room. When I asked why, he said "well, we have all that stuff in there." I for one, think it should all be thrown away, except for his guitars and amp... the rest of it, well, I don't think we've gone looking for anything in those boxes in the two years we've lived in the house. If we haven't needed the stuff in the last two years, we don't need it period, in my book, and we should pitch it. Throwing things away like that makes Hubby a bit nervous... I think he'd be an outrageous pack rat if given half the chance.

I continue to work out. I did weights yesterday and started to get a little bit of a headache again... Hubby says maybe it's because I'm not hydrated enough. So, I'll be carrying a water bottle with me at the gym from now on.

I think I'm getting somewhere with it too... I tried on some of my pre- pregnancy clothes last night and noticed that they were fitting a lot better... In fact tomorrow I'm going to wear a suit that I haven't worn in almost two years... thank goodness it's plain and classic, and therefore not out of style.

Went to go visit my motivation for losing weight today. Sigh. Even Prettier than I thought it would be from the website. Especially in the whiskey color. Took everything I had not to walk out of the store with it.
But I did get myself a little something... a purple leather photo frame heart charm. Just right for a little picture of precious baby.
I went to the gym last night... and got the worst headache ever! I had just started lifting weights and was using the leg press machine when suddenly I got the most horrible pain, right on the top of my head! It was so bad it brought tears to my eyes. I couldn't finish the work out. I couldn't even finish the weights. I grabbed precious baby and went home, trying really hard not to cry the whole way, my head hurt so bad. I took a 600 mg motrin... which didn't take the pain away completely.. it just took the edge off. Hubby thinks that the headache was caused by not eating enough protein. Maybe he's right... he works out religiously, so I guess he would know. And I didn't eat much protein yesterday, so hopefully, that's it. I'll go to the gym and do cardio today (no weights). I'm just going to have to work out on Friday, which is usually my off day, but since I left the gym yesterday after doing one set of weights, I'm going to count it as my off day. That way I still get my six days in --- especially after visiting the Legacy today...you better believe I'm going to get one!!!

Ok, so no size 10. I think the 12s I bought on Friday at old navy were actually 14s and were Mislabeled... I compared them to other 12s and they were definitely much bigger. So I bought some real 12s, and they fit. Now my 14s are too big.
I worked out on both Saturday and Sunday too. And I watched my portions and ate healthy, not junk... Except for Friday night, when we met friends and ate buffalo wings. But at least I worked out like a fiend on Saturday, so maybe that helped.
I did portion up plenty of healthy snacks for this week, so I won't be snacking on junk when I get home. Endame, celery sticks and even blanched asparagus. Yummy!
I'm really committing myself to working out, eating better and getting thinner. I really want the legacy bag, but I think it's even getting beyond that now. I just want to feel better and to look better. I saw my friend Brit at a birthday party on Saturday night and she even commented that I was looking slimmer. It made my day.
So here it is... I will work out six days this week and I will watch my portions, drink water first, before I eat, to make sure I'm not just thirsty, and just drink more water PERIOD. I will eat healthy and not eat junk.
That's really going to be hard on Sunday... Superbowl Sunday... And we are having our yearly superbowl party... Which means junk food. Ouch. But Brit will be there, and she's committed to healthy eating too, so I'll have an ally to help keep me in line. I'll also make sure that we have lots of veggies and low calorie dip to eat, so I won't be so tempted by the queso and buffalo wings.

So, as promised, yesterday I weighed myself. Shudder. 178. 2 pounds lost. God, is that all? I had really hoped for more than that! At this rate, the Legacy Handbag that I want will be discontinued before I get my hands on it.

So, I'm going to have to step up on the work out and work much harder to control my portions at dinner. Last night I didn't do so well with the portion thing. I made a chicken and rice dish in the crock pot for dinner. It had carrots in it, but there weren't enough veggies for my taste. I sauteed some red pepper, yellow squash and zucchini (my favorites!) to add to my plate. Problem is, I had two more plates of chicken and rice after that. I have got to stop the seconds and thirds. So, I'm going to start preparing a lot more veggies for every meal. I figure, If I feel the need to eat more, then at least let it be veggies, and not things like rice or other starchy stuff. Also, I need to drink more water before and during the meal. Maybe if I fill up more on water I'll eat less?

I'm also going to have to work out more. The four day a week plan that I've been on obviously isn't doing enough. I'm going to have to start working out six days a week. I figure that Friday will be my off day, which makes sense, since we always seem to be so busy on Fridays... Especially the Fridays when we have to pick up Boy for the weekend.

So, the plan is...

• More water at dinner both before, during and after... In fact, if I feel the need to eat more, I should drink a glass of water first.
• Watch my portions... No more than one portion of the meat or starch at any meal
• More veggies at every meal
• Work out six days per week

Starting now.

Update:

I went shopping at lunch at old navy. My size 14 jeans were just too loose. I had purchased them on new years eve and they seemed tight then... I know they stretch a little but even freshly washed they are too loose. I purchased a pair of very comfortable size 12s. Maybe Hubby is right. Maybe I am getting thinner. Eating snap beans and low fat ranch dip in celebration. Told you I would eat more veggies!

Yet Another Update:

After wearing the new 12s for about 10 minutes, I am convinced that they are too big too... especially in the waist... they feel like they are going to fall off and there semms to be about 2 inches to spare in the waist band! I'm going to stop by Old Navy on the way home... and try on some 10s!

So as mentioned some time back in this blog, I mean to take better care of myself. That means, primarily, eat better, exercise more, and lose weight. I've been doing pretty well on the eat better front. Every time Hubby has to have LJS (evil, fried fish and chicken... And 990 calories for each meal he eats, and he eats 2!) I have resisted. I eat fruit, or a salad or veggies and dip. I eat oatmeal everyday for breakfast. I eat fruit every day... Lately I've been on a grapefruit kick... I eat a large one every day. I eat a salad or soup for lunch. I try to eat a sensible dinner. That has been my downfall... The dinner is usually sensible, but I think my portions at dinner are just out of control. Yesterday I ate a salad for dinner and two helpings of spaghetti, when I should have only had one. I also find it hard to resist snacking right when I get home... So maybe I need to be snacking on something good... Like carrot sticks and celery, instead of cheese. I have been going to the gym regularly... Well, except for last week, when the entire city shut down for three days due to icy conditions... I didn't go to the gym at all last week. But I went right back this week. And I'm trying to run more because I want to run the big 10K race this year. And I want to look ok doing it... No really, I want to look fabulous, but I'm not sure I'm going to get there that fast.

Last time I weighed myself, I was so disappointed. 180. Horrible. I think I might have lost a little... Hubby says I look thinner, and I recently bought some jeans that are smaller... And they feel a little big... But maybe they stretch when I wear them? I don't know. I guess I need to weigh myself. And the place to do it is at the gym. So I guess I'm going to face that monster today. ***shaking with fear*** I am not looking forward to it. I'd really hate to see no progress at all, since I've really been trying.

But I want to motivate myself. And If I can stick with it, and see some results, I want to get myself this. http://www.coach.com/content/product.aspx?product_no=8555&category_id=68
Beautiful, Isn't it?

So as I mentioned before, we had some seriously wild weather last week. Snow and Ice. Between the MLK holiday, snow days and Confederate hero's day, I was home all of last week with Precious Baby.

It was wonderful. I could so totally be a Stay at home mom. It felt so good to play with her all week, to chase her around, to read stories whenever she came to me with one of her books (pretty much all the time) and to just be there with her. I wish, wish wish I could stay home with her, but we just can't afford it.

Boo.

Insanity continues to ensue. Last Saturday, January 13th, we had torrential rainstorms here in our part of Texas. As a result, the game room at my house flooded. Yep, that's right... Water coursed in, under the walls and soaked my rugs. Luckily, my antique desk, the computer tower and hubby's big screen TV were all spared.

Hubby and I had been planning to renovate the game room and make it nicer, and in fact had planned to start that weekend, but not now. The game room had, at one time, actually been a covered porch that ran the entire length of the back of our house. At some point, a previous owner decided to enclose the porch. It was obvious that they hadn't done the best job, which is why Hubby and I were planning to renovate. But, after the flood waters receded, Hubby started cutting away at the lower walls to determine the extent of the water damage. That was when he discovered just how badly the job had been done. He also found evidence of another, previous flood, and that a section near the back door was rotted out.

"We should just tear it down and expand into the garage," Hubby said after spending some quality time with a saw and a prybar on the gameroom drywall. "It's going to cost us more to fix it than it's worth."

"Are you serious?" I asked. "Can we please do that?" I suddenly had visions of the gameroom replaced by a large, covered porch that ran the length of the back of the house. Posts covered in climbing, flowering vines. My lemon tree nested among potted ferns. A large rattan sette covered with pillows and my outdoor dining table and chairs suddenly having a proper home.

So, we are going to do it. We looked at the garage and consulted Brother in Law, who worked for his dad, a general contractor, for many years. The garage needs to have some concrete poured to raise the foundation to the level of the rest of the house, and we need to install an interior wall to partition the laundry area from the new gameroom. We will recycle the windows from the old gameroom and install them in the opening where the garage door is. This will actually work perfectly because the windows from the current gameroom match the windows in the front of the house, so reusing them will create a sense of continuity when the addition is finished. Once the garage is finished, we will need to hire a contractor to cut an entryway into the new gameroom from our living room wall.

Once that is finished and the furniture is out of the old gameroom, the fun will really begin. We will have to install posts and lintels to support the existing roof, and once that's done, it's time to knock down the walls! I've promised Boy that he can wield a sledgehammer on this project. He is genuinely excited.

Finally, I will have the back porch I've always wanted. And it just took a flood to get there.

So it's 2007....
And the holidays are over, thank goodness. I'll go into THAT later. But right now, I'm going to get shallow and snipey. Mr. Blackwell issued his Worst Dressed List yesterday, and so I guess it inspired me. It's time to talk style, and being that it is 2007, I think it bears mentioning... And that something is... Mall bangs.

yes, mall bangs. Circa 1988.

We all know what I'm talking about here... They start very high on the head and are curled, teased and sprayed until they stand about 6 inches off the head. Often, they were worn with a poodle perm, but it was also quite common to see them with long straight, stringy hair too... This was the WT version of the mall bang.

This came to my attention this morning, as I walked through the cube farm to my office. A resident of the cube farm sports an outrageous WT version of the mall bang. http://www.naughtysecretaryclub.com/BigBangs.htm (Please note that the pictures on this site are merely examples... None of them actually depict the offender I am discussing.) I'd noticed it before, but what really called my attention to it this morning was that (we'll call her) HJ had the rest of her hair pulled back in pony tail, which just really seemed to highlight the insanity that is her mall bang. In fact, HJ's mall bang is so impressive that when she sits at her computer with her back to the lane between cubes, her bangs are clearly visible above and to the sides of her head to all passers by. That's right... Her bangs are visible above and to the sides of her head... from behind.

Now, I don't know how old HJ is. I would guess that she is a few, maybe three, years older than me. I am thirty three, so she is maybe 36? My point regarding her age, is that for crying out loud, mall bangs went out in 1988!!!! It is 2007... That is almost 20, yes TWENTY years ago! I am trying to imagine being stuck in the same beauty rut for 20 years. Dear me. 20 years ago, I was 13. I thought merlot colored hair and fedoras were cool. Thank goodness I'm passed that phase. For proof, click the link. I'm the one without bangs. http://www.flickr.com/photos/gadgetadam/341343665/in/set-72157594452738704/

I really wonder about these folks who get themselves stuck in ruts like this. I can't imagine wearing the same haircut that I had 5 years ago, or wearing the same lipstick shade. Twenty years? Whoa! You have to wonder if these folks have lost their eyesight? And why, oh why have their loving families and friends not staged an intervention on them? Would you let your friends walk around sporting mall bangs? I sure wouldn't. On my planet, at least, friends don't let friends wear mall bangs, or flash dance sweatshirts, or mom jeans, or Christmas sweaters... You get the idea.

Honestly, ***snarkeyness follows*** I really want to just go get a garden hose and spray down HJ's bangs until they are flat on her forehead like bangs should be... like my friend Brit's bangs in the photo I've linked. Of course, given the insane amounts of Aqua Net hairspray that the mall bang requires, a garden hose might not be sufficient. Maybe a fire hose.

I made a lot of new years resolutions this year. One more that needs to be made by all is to take what ever action is necessary to eliminate the mall bangs. Really, mall bangs are the female equivelent of the mullet... and I think we can all agree how much that needs to go. Yes, you, Billy Ray Cyrus. And if you are the one wearing the mall bangs, well, time to find a fire hose, OK? Before I do it for you.